Election Time, Again

Well, it's that time o' year again when we folks in the United States of America go out 'n' decide what we want to complain about fer the next one er more years. The day we try to figger out who the smallest liar is 'n' whether er not we want to agree to vote ourselves another tax we can gripe about having to pay. The day we have to make an extra trip, carve a little extra time out of our busy schedules, 'n' put up with long lines full o' folks we normally wouldn't want to be within fifty feet of, just so we can put some marks on a sheet o' paper 'n' hope that enough other people're smart enough to put the same marks down so that our marks will actually count fer something. It's election day.

I was sharpening my tongue up fer a big ol' diatribe 'bout the sorry bunch o' folks we got to choose from this year. I was coming up with 'n' reviewing some, hopefully, witty 'n' scathing remarks 'bout the propositions they's trying to fool us into getting passed, er voting down. I was ready to lament the poor state o' the Arizona constitution, which they seem determined to keep hacking up, tacking on to, 'n' just generally rewriting ever' year. But then I read something last night that made me rethink the whole thing.

It was an article by Peter M. on his blog 'bout New England Folklore. Mr. M. said that, back in the early years o' this country, even 'for it was a country, folks used to vote in the fall fer their local officials even though the officials didn't take office until the next May. The day they took office in May was called "Election Day" 'n' was celebrated like a holiday. He says that, by 'bout the mid 1700's, the celebrations included such things as parades, parties, athletic events, 'n' even special cakes. The best part 'bout it was, it was a celebration 'bout the simple fact o' being able to elect folks. Nowadays, it seems like the only celebrating folks do 'bout elections is to celebrate that their side won er the other side lost.

So I read that. 'N' then I thought 'bout it a bit. 'N' then I thought 'bout it a bit more. 'N' then I thought 'bout all the time that has passed between then 'n' nowadays 'n' all the changes that have happened in this country 'n' the ways folks viewed the whole voting 'n' election processes during all those 250 to 300 years. Then I thought 'bout the way so many folks seem to treat voting these days.

I thought 'bout the stories I've read 'bout how they used to close down the bars 'n' taverns 'n' the pubs 'n' the buying o' liquor on election days 'n' how you couldn't buy a drink 'til after the polls'd closed 'cause going out to cast your vote was a serious, sober responsibility. Do they even still do that these days? I'd be willing to bet real money that I could walk down to the local grocery store 'n' buy a six pack er a fifth o' something er other 'n' wouldn't no one bat an eye. I bet I could walk into any bar in town at any time today 'n' watch folks getting drunker 'n' drunker as they watched the election news. I'd even be willing to bet that there'd be at least one person, already well past the "legal" limit, who'd suddenly stand up 'n' say, "Shoot! I ain't even voted yet," 'fore running out to the polls.

I thought 'bout the stories o' folks who would get dressed up in their Sunday best to go vote 'cause voting was so important 'n' serious as church. Now days it seems like folks just show up in whatever they happen to have on er whatever they can grab 'fore they head out. In the last Presidential election, there was even a few folks in line who hadn't even bothered to change out o' their bed clothes. (Although, I guess I should give 'em credit fer being so eager 'n' dedicated to vote in that one that they was willing to get up at all that early in the morning.)

 I thought 'bout all those folks back 'fore there were cars who had to walk er ride miles 'n' miles to get to where they was supposed to go to vote 'cause it was so important to 'em. So many of 'em today seem to treat it more like some kind o' chore er drudge than the right er privilege that it is. They seem to approach it like it's some sort of odious task, like having to clean the cat box er jury duty er something. The biggest thing these days seem to be all the folks signing up to early vote er vote by mail so they don't have to take that extra time out o' their day to go do it. Personally, I get a big shot o' pride walking up to that desk 'n' taking pen in hand to mark all those little circles. I stand a little taller when I walk out o' the building with my little "I Voted" sticker tacked onto my shirt. I ain't never seen it as a chore ner an imposition. I've always seen it as a solemn something I'm more'n proud 'n' happy 'n' honored to do.

'N' I thought 'bout the idea of a bunch o' dour, humorless Puritans kicking their heels up 'n' having celebrations 'cause the folks they got to pick was stepping into office, instead of a bunch o' folks someone else had lumped 'em with. Now days it seems like so many folks're so busy voting 'gainst something er someone they cain't take no joy in their decisions.  Maybe that's why we ain't having no parades ner parties ner even special cakes to celebrate the fact that the folks we get to pick're stepping into office. Maybe too many folks these days're feeling like they's stuck with a bunch o' folks someone else lumped 'em with 'cause they felt like they couldn't vote fer who they really wanted lest the "wrong" person wound up winning.

So I thought 'bout all this stuff 'n' I decided I was going to try 'n' learn a lesson from the way they viewed elections back in the olden days. From here on out, I'm going to try 'n' keep my sharp tongue in my pocket on election day. I'm going to try 'n' keep my civil tongue in my mouth on the days I get the privilege o' going to the polls 'n' jotting down my two cents' worth in the form o' little dots on a page. I'm going to try 'n' show the day the respect it rightfully deserves 'n', who knows, maybe next year I'll even make a special cake on the day. 'Sides, I got all the other days o' the year to take my sharp tongue out o' my pocket 'n' use it.

(mis)Interpreting the State of the Union Address (Part VIII)

The State of the Union given by President Oprama Weds. Jan. 27, 2010
What they said	What I heard
That is the leadership that we are providing — engagement that advances the common security and prosperity of all people. We are working through the G-20 to sustain a lasting global recovery. We are working with Muslim communities around the world to promote science, education and innovation. We have gone from a bystander to a leader in the fight against climate change. We are helping developing countries to feed themselves and continuing the fight against HIV/AIDS. And we are launching a new initiative that will give us the capacity to respond faster and more effectively to bioterrorism or an infectious disease — a plan that will counter threats at home and strengthen public health abroad.	That's the kind o' leadership I'm providing: ensuring the security 'n' prosperity o' those who agree with me, 'n' endangering the security 'n' destroying the prosperity o' those who don't agree with me. We are working through the G-20 to take control o' the global economy so we can tell other countries how they should be doing things. We are working with Muslim communities 'round the world to try 'n' drag 'em into our version of enlightenment. We've finally caved in to the views o' the misguided 'n' gullible masses to fight global warming. We are helping developing countries so they'll quit taking our food so we can maybe start charging decent prices so more Americans can afford a decent meal 'n' continuing to try 'n' teach 'em how to keep it in their britches so they won't keep spreading AIDS. We are continuing to scare folks with the threat o' bioterrorism 'n' pandemics so the chemical 'n' drug companies can continue to make outrageous profits off their unnecessary products.
As we have for over 60 years, America takes these actions because our destiny is connected to those beyond our shores. But we also do it because it is right. That is why, as we meet here tonight, over 10,000 Americans are working with many nations to help the people of Haiti recover and rebuild. That is why we stand with the girl who yearns to go to school in Afghanistan, we support the human rights of the women marching through the streets of Iran, and we advocate for the young man denied a job by corruption in Guinea. For America must always stand on the side of freedom and human dignity.	Just like we have fer over 60 years, we're doing this because it is America's destiny to rule the world. We also do it 'cause we're right, 'n' ever'body else needs to realize that. That's why we're helping folks in Haiti recover from their earthquake, so they'll think we're so wonderful they'll want to be like us. That's why we support girls wanting to go to school in Afghanistan, women marching 'gainst the gov'ment in Iran, folks who ain't corrupt enough to get a job in Guinea, so they'll all think we're so wonderful they'll want to be like us. 'Cause America must always stand on the side o' the way we define freedom 'n' human dignity.
Abroad, America’s greatest source of strength has always been our ideals. The same is true at home. We find unity in our incredible diversity, drawing on the promise enshrined in our Constitution: the notion that we are all created equal, that no matter who you are or what you look like, if you abide by the law you should be protected by it, that if you adhere to our common values you should be treated no different than anyone else.	Abroad, our greatest source o' strngth has always been American ideals. That holds true here. We find unity in diverse folks all acting 'n' thinking the same, drawing on the promise in our Constititution that all American citizens are created equal, long as you look kind o' the same as the majority o' other Americans, if you don't fight against the unconstitutional 'n' discrimanatory laws imposed upon you, that if you just do what you're told you will be treated like ever'one else. Course, you have to be a legal American citizen fer us to allow you to claim all those freedoms 'n' rights.
We must continually renew this promise. My administration has a civil rights division that is once again prosecuting civil rights violations and employment discrimination. We finally strengthened our laws to protect against crimes driven by hate. This year, I will work with Congress and our military to finally repeal the law that denies gay Americans the right to serve the country they love because of who they are. We are going to crack down on violations of equal pay laws — so that women get equal pay for an equal day’s work. And we should continue the work of fixing our broken immigration system — to secure our borders, enforce our laws and ensure that everyone who plays by the rules can contribute to our economy and enrich our nations.	We must continually beat you over the head with this idea. My rule has a division that is once again persecuting folks who are even perceived o' civil rights violations 'n' employment discrimination, 'long as their actions follow our definition o' what constitutes civil rights violations 'n' employment discrimination. We have finally strengthened the laws 'gainst hate crimes. This year, I'm going to make Congress 'n' the military finally repeal the don't ask, don't tell law so that gays who love their country just as much as the next person can finally serve openly in the military. We are going to crack down on violations of equal pay laws so women can finally make the same kind o' wages the fellers are making. 'N' we will continue to fight 'gainst the evil illegal aliens flooding our country. It don't matter that these folks are risking their very lives to try 'n' provide a better life fer their families. They ain't got no place in a society that encourages freedom 'n' prosperity fer all folks.
In the end, it is our ideals, our values, that built America — values that allowed us to forge a nation made up of immigrants from every corner of the globe, values that drive our citizens still. Every day, Americans meet their responsibilities to their families and their employers. Time and again, they lend a hand to their neighbors and give back to their country. They take pride in their labor, and are generous in spirit. These aren’t Republican values or Democratic values they’re living by, business values or labor values. They are American values.	In the end, it is these selfish, self-centered, 'n' self-righteous ideals 'n' values that built America: values that 'lowed us to to forge a nation made up of immigrants that now excludes other immigrants who share the same dreams, hopes, 'n' desires that brought those earlier immigrants from ev'ry corner o' the globe. Ever' day, Americans give what is due to their families 'n' their bosses. Time 'n' again, they help out the folks they know 'n' pay their taxes so they won't get tho'wed in jail. They do their jobs, no matter how much they may hate 'em, 'n' are generous in spirit, if not in material goods. These ain't just the values o' Republicans er Democrats, business er labor. They are the values of America.
Unfortunately, too many of our citizens have lost faith that our biggest institutions — our corporations, our media and, yes, our government — still reflect these same values. Each of these institutions are full of honorable men and women doing important work that helps our country prosper. But each time a CEO rewards himself for failure, or a banker puts the rest of us at risk for his own selfish gain, people’s doubts grow. Each time lobbyists game the system or politicians tear each other down instead of lifting this country up, we lose faith. The more that TV pundits reduce serious debates into silly arguments and big issues into sound bites, our citizens turn away.	Unfortunately, most folks don't believe that our corporations, media, er gov'ment share these values. Each o' these groups have folks doing the important work o' trying to impose these values on others. But each time their selfish, self-centered, self-righteous actions are applied only to themselves, doubts grow. Each time lobbyists er politicians do something other than lifting this country up as a beacon to the rest o' the world that we won't let 'em claim fer their own, we lose faith. The more TV folks take what I say out o' context er show me doing the opposite o' what I say, our citizens turn away.
No wonder there’s so much cynicism out there.	No wonder folks don't believe us.
No wonder there’s so much disappointment.	No wonder folks don't like us.
I campaigned on the promise of change — change we can believe in, the slogan went. And right now, I know there are many Americans who aren’t sure if they still believe we can change — or at least, that I can deliver it.	I promised change we can believe in. Right now, a lot o' folks ain't sure they wan't the kind o' change I'm offering.
But remember this — I never suggested that change would be easy or that I can do it alone. Democracy in a nation of 300 million people can be noisy and messy and complicated. And when you try to do big things and make big changes, it stirs passions and controversy. That’s just how it is.	Remember this, I just promised change. I never said I would actually deliver on that promise. Democracy in a nation o' 300 million folks ain't easy. You cain't please ever'one. That's just the way it works.
Those of us in public office can respond to this reality by playing it safe and avoid telling hard truths. We can do what’s necessary to keep our poll numbers high and get through the next election instead of doing what’s best for the next generation.	Those of us in public office can ignore reality. We can focus on just getting re-elected the next time 'round, irregardless o' how much we damage the country doing it.
But I also know this: If people had made that decision 50 years ago or 100 years ago or 200 years ago, we wouldn’t be here tonight. The only reason we are is because generations of Americans were unafraid to do what was hard, to do what was needed even when success was uncertain, to do what it took to keep the dream of this nation alive for their children and grandchildren.	But I also know this: if folks had thought this way years 'n' years ago, I wouldn't be here tonight. The only reason I'm here now is 'cause generations of Americans were'nt afraid to do the right thing, not just fer themselves er their own children 'n' grandchildren, but fer their fellow human beings, irregardless o' race, nationality, color, socio-economic status, gender, age, er even whether er not they even knew those other folks.
Our administration has had some political setbacks this year and some of them were deserved. But I wake up every day knowing that they are nothing compared to the setbacks that families all across this country have faced this year. And what keeps me going — what keeps me fighting — is that despite all these setbacks, that spirit of determination and optimism — that fundamental decency that has always been at the core of the American people — lives on.	I've had some political setbacks this year, I ain't going to deny it. But I wake up ever' day knowing it ain't nothing compared to the kinds o' setbacks folks all 'cross the country have had to face. That's what keeps me going: that spirit o' stuborness 'n' hope 'n' the fundamental decency 'n' fairness that is supposed to be at the core o' the American folks.
It lives on in the struggling small business owner who wrote to me of his company, “None of us,” he said, “are willing to consider, even slightly, that we might fail.”	Now I'd like to give an example o' that from some letters I've gotten. I ain't actually read none of 'em, but I've been told that they were sent to me.
It lives on in the woman who said that even though she and her neighbors have felt the pain of recession, “We are strong. We are resilient. We are American.”
It lives on in the 8-year-old boy in Louisiana, who just sent me his allowance and asked if I would give it to the people of Haiti. And it lives on in all the Americans who’ve dropped everything to go some place they’ve never been and pull people they’ve never known from rubble, prompting chants of “USA! USA! USA!” when another life was saved.
The spirit that has sustained this nation for more than two centuries lives on in you, its people.	That spirit o' fundamental fairness 'n' equality fer all folks may be on life support these days, but I believe it still lives.
We have finished a difficult year. We have come through a difficult decade. But a new year has come. A new decade stretches before us. We don’t quit. I don’t quit. Let’s seize this moment — to start anew, to carry the dream forward, and to strengthen our union once more.	It ain't been an easy year. The Republicans have made a right hash out o' the last decade. But a new year has come. We's facing a new decade where I'm in control, not the Republicans. We ain't going to quit. I ain't going to quit. Get out o' my way 'n' let me do what I need to do to start anew, carry the dream forward, 'n' strengthen our union once more.
Thank you. God Bless You. And God Bless the United States of America.	Now I'll close with the traditional statement, so the Republicans will have one less thing to beat me over the head with 'n' because I really do love 'n' care 'bout America 'n' the folks who live here. God Bless You. 'N' God Bless the United States of America.

(mis)Interpreting the State of the Union Address (Part VII)

The State of the Union given by President Oprama Weds. Jan. 27, 2010
What they said	What I heard
I’m also calling on Congress to continue down the path of earmark reform. You have trimmed some of this spending and embraced some meaningful change. But restoring the public trust demands more. For example, some members of Congress post some earmark requests online. Tonight, I’m calling on Congress to publish all earmark requests on a single Web site before there’s a vote, so that the American people can see how their money is being spent.	I'm also telling Congress to quit all the pork-barreling. They've alread done a little bit o' that. But it ain't nearly enough. Some o' ya'll already post your pork-barreling online where folks can see it. Tonight, I'm telling all ya'll to do it on a single web site 'fore you go voting on 'em so all America can see how you're wasting their money.
Of course, none of these reforms will even happen if we don’t also reform how we work with one another.	Course, none o' that'll work if we cain't all learn how to get along better.
Now, I am not naive. I never thought the mere fact of my election would usher in peace, harmony and some post-partisan era. I knew that both parties have fed divisions that are deeply entrenched. And on some issues, there are simply philosophical differences that will always cause us to part ways. These disagreements, about the role of government in our lives, about our national priorities and our national security, have been taking place for over 200 years. They are the very essence of our democracy.	Now, I ain't stupid. In spite o' what I may have said when I was campaigning fer office, I know my being 'lected weren't going to result in sudden peace, harmony, 'n' love. I knew both sides refused to get along with each other. Sometimes we just think dif'rently from each other. Some o' this dif'rent thinking, over such things as how much gov'ment should be doing fer folks, where our priorities lie, 'n' national security, have been going on fer more'n 200 years. But that's what Democracy's all 'bout.
But what frustrates the American people is a Washington where every day is election day. We cannot wage a perpetual campaign where the only goal is to see who can get the most embarrassing headlines about their opponent — a belief that if you lose, I win. Neither party should delay or obstruct every single bill just because they can. The confirmation of well-qualified public servants should not be held hostage to the pet projects or grudges of a few individual senators. Washington may think that saying anything about the other side, no matter how false, is just part of the game. But it is precisely such politics that has stopped either party from helping the American people. Worse yet, it is sowing further division among our citizens and further distrust in our government.	What gives folks conniptions is the way we all act like we're constantly running fer office. We cain't always be out to just try 'n' embarass the other feller: sort o' the worst I can make you look, the better I seem by comparison. None o' ya'll should be getting in the other feller's way just 'cause you can. You shouldn't be holding up the confirmation o' my nominees just 'cause you don't like me. Washington folks may think they can tell just any ol' whoppers 'bout each other they want. But it's just that kind o' foolishness that's stopping us from doing anything like work. 'N' it sure ain't winning you no friends 'mong American citizens.
So no, I will not give up on changing the tone of our politics. I know it’s an election year. And after last week, it is clear that campaign fever has come even earlier than usual. But we still need to govern. To Democrats, I would remind you that we still have the largest majority in decades, and the people expect us to solve some problems, not run for the hills. And if the Republican leadership is going to insist that 60 votes in the Senate are required to do any business at all in this town, then the responsibility to govern is now yours as well. Just saying no to everything may be good short-term politics, but it’s not leadership. We were sent here to serve our citizens, not our ambitions. So let’s show the American people that we can do it together. This week, I’ll be addressing a meeting of the House Republicans. And I would like to begin monthly meetings with both the Democratic and Republican leadership. I know you can’t wait.	So I ain't going to give up on trying to get ya'll to behave. I know it's another 'lection year, but ain't they all? Ya'll may have all caught campaign fever already, but we still got a job to do. I'll remind my fellow liberals that we're still number one, 'n' folks're still looking fer us to do something fer 'em. To the Republicans who say we still need their votes to get anything done 'round here, I say that means ya'll are on the hook too. Just saying "no" anytime we ask ya'll to try 'n' do something ain't what I call leadership. We were sent here to help Americans, not ourselves. So let's show 'em we actually can do what we're s'posed to be doing. This week I'm going to be giving the Republicans a good talking to. 'N' I'd like to give both sides a good dressing down ever' month. Bet ya'll are really looking forward to that.
Throughout our history, no issue has united this country more than our security. Sadly, some of the unity we felt after 9/11 has dissipated. We can argue all we want about who’s to blame for this, but I am not interested in relitigating the past. I know that all of us love this country. All of us are committed to its defense. So let’s put aside the schoolyard taunts about who is tough. Let’s reject the false choice between protecting our people and upholding our values. Let’s leave behind the fear and division and do what it takes to defend our nation and forge a more hopeful future — for America and the world.	Throughout history, no issue has divided our country more than what constitutes our security 'n' the best way to achieve it. We seemed somewhat more unified 'bout all that after 9/11, but it ain't lasted. You can argue 'bout who to blame fer that, but we all know it was the Republicans, so that's all I got to say 'bout that. I know we all love what this country can do fer us, instead of us going out 'n' doing things fer ourselves. All of us want to see it defended. We just cain't agree on the best way to do that. So let's quit with the childish bullying each other. They ain't no choice between protection 'n' values. We can have both. Remember, withouth America, the whole world'ld fall apart.
That is the work we began last year. Since the day I took office, we have renewed our focus on the terrorists who threaten our nation. We have made substantial investments in our homeland security and disrupted plots that threatened to take American lives. We are filling unacceptable gaps revealed by the failed Christmas attack, with better airline security and swifter action on our intelligence. We have prohibited torture and strengthened partnerships from the Pacific to South Asia to the Arabian Peninsula. And in the last year, hundreds of al-Qaida’s fighters and affiliates, including many senior leaders, have been captured or killed — far more than in 2008.	That's what I started doing last year. From day one, I've changed our focus from Iraq to Afghanistan. I've squandered more money on failed 'n' unnecessary homeland security measures 'n' claim we disrupted plots, real er imagined, that threatened American lives. We're making air travel even more frustrating fer reg'lar folks fer no good reason. Let's face it, the failed Christmas attack proved that, no matter how much we inconvenience folks, if someone is determined enough to try 'n' commit an act o' terrorism, they'll find a way. We've stopped admitting to torturing prisoners 'n' have strengthened our ties with other countries. Most important, at least fer my image, is that last year I personally killed more al-Qaida fighters 'n' senior leaders than Jr. did the year before. Yeah, I'm butch.
In Afghanistan, we are increasing our troops and training Afghan Security Forces so they can begin to take the lead in July of 2011 and our troops can begin to come home. We will reward good governance, reduce corruption and support the rights of all Afghans — men and women alike. We are joined by allies and partners who have increased their own commitment, and who will come together tomorrow in London to reaffirm our common purpose. There will be difficult days ahead. But I am confident we will succeed.	I'm sending more troops to Afghanistan while claiming it's to help reduce our numbers o' troops there. If the Afghan gov'ment can do a better job o' running things in their country than what we're doing in ours, we'll give 'em a hearty pat on the back 'n' a big thumbs-up. There's other countries that're also increasing their troops in Afghanistan, 'n' they'll be having a get-together in London tomorrow to congratulate each other 'bout that. It ain't going to be an easy row to hoe, but I know I can get ever'body to agree with me eventually.
As we take the fight to al-Qaida, we are responsibly leaving Iraq to its people. As a candidate, I promised that I would end this war, and that is what I am doing as president. We will have all of our combat troops out of Iraq by the end of this August. We will support the Iraqi government as they hold elections, and continue to partner with the Iraqi people to promote regional peace and prosperity. But make no mistake: This war is ending, and all of our troops are coming home.	As we move more troops into Afghanistan, we'll be leaving Iraq to fend fer itself. I said in my campaigning that I was going to hang 'em out to dry, 'n' that's just what I'm going to do. I'm pulling all our combat troops out of Iraq by the end of August. We'll still cheer the Iraqis on 'n' continue to tell 'em how we think they should be running their country 'n' what they's doing wrong. But make no mistake: I'm going to put an end to this thing, 'n' all our troops will be coming home. Ne'mind what I just said 'bout only combat troops leaving. Now I'm saying all troops. I just said combat troops the first time so we can leave some other kinds o' troops there if we need to without me making a liar out o' myself. 'N' once our troops do get home, we'll just turn 'em right back 'round 'n' pack 'em all off to Afghanistan. But they will come home first.
Tonight, all of our men and women in uniform — in Iraq, Afghanistan and around the world — must know that they have our respect, our gratitude and our full support. And just as they must have the resources they need in war, we all have a responsibility to support them when they come home. That is why we made the largest increase in investments for veterans in decades. That is why we are building a 21st century VA. And that is why Michelle has joined with Jill Biden to forge a national commitment to support military families.	Tonight, all our folks in the military, whether they be in Iraq, Afghanistan, er anywhere else in the world, need to know they have our respect, gratitude, 'n' full support. (I knew that'd finally get you stony faced fellers from the Joint Chiefs o' Staff on your feet. Don't want to go looking bad in front o' your own folks, do you.) 'N' just as we need to give 'em what they have to have to fight, we need to give 'em what they have to have when they finally get home. That's why I ran us even deeper into debt fer the largest increase in veteran investments in decades. That's why we're finally going to get 'round to providing 'em with some decent healthcare fer a change. That's why I'm making both the Mrs. 'n' Mrs. Joe work on supporting military families.
Even as we prosecute two wars, we are also confronting perhaps the greatest danger to the American people — the threat of nuclear weapons. I have embraced the vision of John F. Kennedy and Ronald Reagan through a strategy that reverses the spread of these weapons and seeks a world without them. To reduce our stockpiles and launchers, while ensuring our deterrent, the United States and Russia are completing negotiations on the farthest-reaching arms control treaty in nearly two decades. And at April’s nuclear security summit, we will bring 44 nations together behind a clear goal: securing all vulnerable nuclear materials around the world in four years, so that they never fall into the hands of terrorists.	'N' just 'cause we's already fighting two dif'rent wars, don't go thinking that's going to stop us from trying to keep scaring you 'bout the threat o' nuclear weapons. I'm just going to do the same things Kennedy 'n' Reagan done, even though they obv'ously didn't work, so you'll think I'm the same kind o' great leaders folks say they was. We're going to reduce our nuclear arsenal, while still being able to look tough enough that won't no one want to mess with us, by negotiating the farthest-reaching arms control treaty with Russia in almost two decades. Considering how little's been done 'bout that the past twenty years, I know it don't mean much, but it sure sounds impressive. 'N' in April we's going to have a nuclear security summit with 44 other nations. Our goal is going to be to secure all vulnerable nuclear material all 'round the world within four years so don't no terrorists get a hold of it. Course, they's going to be some countries with nuclear material that ain't going to be there. 'N', no matter how hard we try, if anyone wants to get their hands on nuclear materal bad enough, they'll find a way.
These diplomatic efforts have also strengthened our hand in dealing with those nations that insist on violating international agreements in pursuit of these weapons. That is why North Korea now faces increased isolation and stronger sanctions — sanctions that are being vigorously enforced. That is why the international community is more united, and the Islamic Republic of Iran is more isolated. And as Iran’s leaders continue to ignore their obligations, there should be no doubt: They, too, will face growing consequences.	That means we can gang up on those countries that disagree with us 'n' think they should be able to provide their citizens with cheap, clean nuclear energy. That's why North Korea is continuing to isolate themselves 'n' we are vigorously enforcing sanctions that only serve to hurt the common folks, since the leaders o' that country ain't suffering from 'em. 'N' if Iran don't toe the line, we's going to do the same to them.